Because Sometimes I’m Not a Good Mom

I found myself waking up today and repeating yesterday’s routine. It’s always the same. The kids always want a snack—you guys, THEY ALWAYS WANT A SNACK!—or somebody said something unkind to someone else, and now I have to pull my crap together and try to make it a teachable moment while trying desperately to not let hurtful words come out of my own mouth and break the hearts of my children. *deep breath, Sara*

Because sometimes I’m just not a great mom.

I’m a full-time student. A mother. A wife. Also, college costs a lot of money so I use whatever free time I have to earn cash from home. You know, because if I work outside the house all the money would go towards childcare and I’d be back to square one. And the stress of this takes up my brainpower and leaves me putting my needs above everyone else’s and forgetting to reach out to friends who I haven’t talked to in a while to see how they’re coping with their own lives.

Because sometimes I’m just not a good friend.

To top everything off, my hubby’s had a few late nights at work, which means I am on double-duty and don’t get a break. Then he comes home exhausted and I’m on edge from my hectic day, and then we forget how to communicate with each other and end up arguing over stupid, meaningless things.

Because sometimes I’m not a great wife.

After eight straight days of having sick kids and more homework than I can mange, I was truly at the end of my rope today. It was one of those “do whatever you can to make it through the day” kind of days.

And then this happened.

I was doing homework on the couch next to my four-year-old (between one of her many vomiting sessions), when I heard her say, “Thanks, Mommy.”

“For what?” I asked, looking up from my books.

“For being the best mommy in the whole world.”

Now, I’m not sure if it was the 12 pieces of licorice I let her eat before dinner or the high fever talking, but I looked in her eyes and saw it was her truth. Her eyes held nothing but love for me and that love put my world in perspective immediately.

I put down my school books, made myself forget about the dirty dishes currently rotting in the sink, and I turned my phone on silent.

Then I scooped up her warm, little body and rocked her until she fell asleep in my arms.

Because sometimes I’m the best mommy in the whole world.

 

Keep calm and mom on, ladies. You got this.

 

~Sara